Friday Photo Critique #16
Friday Photo Critique is our weekly community project, where we publish a photograph submitted by one of our wonderful readers, then ask you all to offer constructive feedback on the image.
It’s a great way to learn more about photography, express your viewpoint, and have your own image critiqued. Your response will also be displayed with a link to your website or portfolio, so be sure to enter it correctly when submitting a comment!
Quick Ground Rules
- Play nice! We’ve deliberately chosen photographs that aren’t perfect, so please be constructive with any criticism.
- Feel free to offer any type of advice – composition, lighting, post-processing etc.
- You can also link to photographs that you feel offer a great example of this type of image shot exceptionally well.
Without further ado, here is this week’s candidate for Friday Photo Critique!
The Photograph
Photographer: Joell C. Lapitan
Please let us know what you think in the comments – how would you have approached the scene or taken the photo differently? A massive thank you to everyone who commented last week.
The most constructive and helpful comments will be featured on the site, and you’ll also be given priority to feature your own work in a future Friday Photo Critique!.
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Great try but I strongly feel that you should have shown us a bigger picture. For example you could have shown more of the building. A wider angle, basically would have helped.
Hi,
First look the picture is not really meaningfull or well taken (One day i’ll be able to say what i’ve got in my head in english, yes one day \o/ ), we could see an underexposed image with coloured clouds in the background… Nothing really “sexy”
but, the building looks like a russian (or anyway) church and that could really make sense, something like time pass and the church/religion is still here (for you… Or your cat)…
Well, i think the idea is good but there’s 2 or 3 things that make the picture not really efficient, a lake of stars (not the right timing) it’s maybe a common idea but i think the picture could be better with that, the blur on/of the clouds is “croped”, all the clouds are not blured, looking here like a bad photoshop treatment ^^ and maybe the picture should be better if not took with a iphone… (it look like this).
BUT a good idea !!
I offer a champagne’s bottle or a cofee on st-michel place to the phototuts+ member who understand one line of my humble comment ^^
Best,
R.
Interesting Sky, but boring subject. This “part of a building”, is just dull and flat, with no interesting features at all. The shape of it works okay, as it “points” to the sky, which is the more interesting part of the image.
Re: The sky. At first glance I thought they where shooting stars, but on closerr inspection, it looks like there may be some dust on the lens. TBH it looks as if the image needs a clean up in PS.
As the above posters says, it looks like it was taken with a mobile phone camera.
If the roof was a bit lighter and of more interest (ie, something with detail), the image might have more merit.
I have to agree with everyone here. your subject is not that interesting. it is to close up to the building that boring and confusing. we ask ourselves,”why did he only show this part of the picture”,”what is he hiding from me.” Also, it is tilted to the side just a little bit but not enough to make it work or make it seem like it was on purpose. some accidents can work but most of the time it is going to work against you. If you had the corner of the building point towards the corners of the frame (more extreme angle) or bleed off the picture i think it would create more movement and interest. The focal point i get is the red sphere but that is dark and dim and not that interesting. Also, one of my pet peeves is things to close to the edge. when things are to close to the edge your mind rejects it immediately because it gets confused with the lines. try to give alittle more space from the frame edges next time and also you have trapped space in the bottom right corner, that is a definate no-no.
check out some of my work here: http://www.taylorphotography.tumblr.com
I think the biggest problem with this image is the angle… it’s not quite square, it’s not quite tilted, it’s just kind of “off”.
It’s a little under exposed, and could benefit from higher contrast also I think, but more than anything improving the composition would greatly help. I agree with Can(above) that a wider angle would help, or alternatively, a more extreme crop angle across the building’s roof – there are so many wonderful lines there, I recommend really pushing it next time and try to make the most of them.
I agree. Maybe if the image was zoomed out, we can understand what the photo was about. The lighting is too dark. I really like the sky though.
thanks for the comments.. im actually aiming for the clouds effect.. using long exposure..
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jlapitan/4053230086/sizes/o/
oh and no post processing involved
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jlapitan/4053230086/meta/
hope to see more comments..
The pros: there are some cool things happening in the sky. The stars are beginning to trail, and the motion blurs of the clouds are cool. The steeple is a cool shape jutting into the sky as well.
The cons: The sky is dull. Despite your long exposure, there is no color. I think the time of night that you took it at could be the problem. A little more towards dusk or dawn and maybe you get some more purples blues and pinks in there. The temple or church has no context. I like the shape of it, but again, its kinda dull–a bit static in this image. Maybe if you were closer to the building shooting upwards you could have emphasized the height of the steeple. Lastly, the church doesn’t really work as a silhouette. Your image has low contrast to begin with, so the fact that there is no detail in the church makes it a bit boring. Perhaps lighting it up with a flash, or painting it with light with a spotlight would have worked.
The concept is right on the edge, the execution needs work… good luck!
Great photo,
Interesting shot,
maybe i can be one of your subject someday \m/, ^_^ .\m/
The place looks familiar
I’m with Raoul and am curious whether the blurred cloud effect was done in Photoshop, as the clouds on the lower-left aren’t very blurred (although now that I look again, there are some higher-up clouds in the middle of the blur which aren’t very blurred, so maybe it was just fast-moving lower clouds after all.
I think the image would have been far more interesting if you could see the building, rather than having it be such a dark-on-dark silhouette. A brighter/bluer sky would also have benefited you here.
And maybe move yourself a little bit so you’re getting more of the sky and cropping out some of that building on the left, maybe as much as mid-slope of the roof.
I love this image! The motion in the sky looks great, and I think the zoom level is great to show the details! I also like the desaturated colors which gives a very nice mysterious look!
Good work!
Despite the mysterious look of the image I feel your post production is a little off beat. The angle and the subject are not very exciting. However I like the concept. Your execution needs a little work, try to shoot it straight from below, you can get a better dynamic and motion for your image.
Bit grainy around the roof.
Very nice effects. The building could be more appealing if you had exposed some detail and color. As it is, it makes me think of a billboard that I would like to move out of the way. Excellent exposure for a raw photo.
Remember it is much easier to critique than to create.
the only thing keeping the picture from looking amazing is the fact you cant see the building. id suggest a little light painting. while the shutter is open grab a light source (flash light, car light, cunstruction lamp, anything will do) and shine the light on the building
Overall I like the picture – but here are my suggestions to make it better.
Consider moving the building to the right slightly. It would still give the effect of drawing the viewer’s eye upwards, and it would allow you more space for the sky – which I believe is the main draw of the image.
As others have stated, the building is a bit dark. It does not need to be much lighter, but enough to allow the eye to naturally see the details in the building (roof) without having to explicitly focus on it. The red(?) roof would provide more color and play well off the clouds and the light near the horizon. This could be done via post processing or during your exposure. Either should serve you well.